Better known as the blog where we rename bosses to better make jokes, i.e. orc=ogre.
Yesterday I took my first sick day from work and my first sick day from my blogs. Apparently days-old restaurant leftovers are only a good idea for your wallet, not your digestive system. But after spending eighteen hours in bed on Wednesday, I’m back!
Luckily I did manage to beat our friend the ogre with an identity crisis–granted it is one I imposed on him for comedic purposes. And you know what? Trial and error doesn’t even begin to cover it.
First I tried to do exactly what the Internet told me to do–give everyone a bow and force them to attack from far away. Here I made a miracle happen and got the ogre down to so little HP I couldn’t even make it out on the health bar. I decided that it was so little I could go into hack-and-slash mode and hit him head-on until he died. Ha. Ha. Hahaha. Too bad he interrupted my first attempt to heal. And then this was the closest I got to winning for an hour. Hahaha. Ha.
I did discover that using my character as bait was one of the best strategies. If I could get the ogre to follow me around, I could stay far enough ahead of him that I wouldn’t get badly wounded while my party members attacked him from across the room. I put on the heaviest armor I could–one of the best ways to attract enemies–and ran around like a blind goat in a thunderstorm. Unfortunately he wouldn’t consistently follow me. This strategy would work from the start half of the time, and, most of the time, I would accidentally run too close to my party, causing him to focus on them instead. No matter how much I danced around and threw acid at him, he still wanted to hurl rocks and smash everyone else. Then all I could do was try to switch to these characters and prolong their deaths as long as possible. If I switched to a party member the ogre was already focused on and tried the distraction strategy, he would forget who I was. And after all the time we spent together…
But really, I don’t know which it is–a prejudice against victims who can think for themselves or a fetish for AI.
I really hate admitting this, really I do, but the only way I won was atrocious–switching to easy mode. In my defense, my goal is to finish the games and be able to write about my progress. Keyword: progress. I even considered a post where I described my attempts in detail, but my turns stopped varying much after the first few. I either used archers, tried to distract him, or died too quickly to use any strategy whatsoever. Of course I turned the difficulty back to normal–oh, what a challenge!
But of course, sadly I was right. After winning the fight, everyone I had ever met died except for the people who saved me. Hopefully this means I am at the part where I get know people besides my silent character and Alistair, your typical faithful knight as far as I can tell.